Defining YOUR Confidence
A few weeks ago, I decided to dine alfresco alone. It was a beautiful evening, my spouse was out of town on business, and I was craving Italian. I walked to one of my favorite neighborhood spots and checked in with the host.
“Just 1!” I said cheerfully. An awkward, yet polite, smile was received in return and I was quickly taken to a small table outside. “Solo?” was repeatedly asked by the servers as my bread arrived and drink order was taken. I may have also ordered 2 entrees, so perhaps the question was warranted. I digress though.
This was not my first-time dining solo. As extroverted as I may seem, I actually thoroughly enjoy spending time alone. Throughout my 20s, I went to movies, bars, restaurants, and even Europe by myself. The label of “having confidence” was always given to me because of these behaviors.
Confidence is such a tricky word as I believe it is self-defined. I never associated confidence with these actions. I was just, “being me.” In fact, I struggled a lot internally with confidence because to me, confidence meant you were smart, or an expert, or extremely qualified to be doing the work you were doing. I never believed those things about myself, which is why it felt weird having people give me such a bold label for doing something that comes so naturally.
When I think about confidence now, I think about it through the lens of my superpowers – the things that are innately who I am:
I am a good listener
I am able to connect with people very quickly
I have a passion for public speaking and being in front of an audience
I absolutely LOVE to serve and help others
The more I lean into my superpowers and my natural strengths, the more confident I am and also come across.
Now it’s your turn. What are your superpowers?
Think about the things that others admire most about you, but you don’t think twice because it’s simply “who you are.” Maybe you are super analytical and love diving into spreadsheets (NOT ME) or can turn chaos into order. Maybe you’re great at solving problems or have the ability to see patterns where others don’t. Whatever it is, how would it feel to associate CONFIDENCE with those traits?
At the end of the day, we all have confidence. Once you define yours, it will be hard not to shine.
Cheers!
